I gave birth to our second child, our precious little daughter Emmeline, on 28th February. Three weeks later, my body is still utterly wrecked. This pregnancy was sooooooo much harder than my first, at every stage, and I am so grateful I now have a beautiful boy and a gorgeous girl to complete our family, as I sure as hell won't be putting my body through another one! The morning sickness, anaemia, fatigue, nasal congestion, aches and pains, the tearing down below (we'll leave it at that... I won't regale you with any further descriptions of how my mashed up muff now resembles a badly stuffed kebab...) and ongoing issues after (piles - oh, what an absolute joy they are) have all been much worse this time round. The worst thing by far though has been the debilitating pelvic girdle pain. In my first pregnancy, I ran, cycled and swam right up until my due date. This time, I was pretty much housebound from week 34 onwards.
For anyone not familiar with pelvic girdle pain, it's basically when all the muscles surrounding the pelvis slacken off to allow the pelvis to open and subsequently push a head the size of a melon out of an opening the size of a grape. The hormone that generates this process is called relaxin, and it builds up throughout pregnancy, but it is also generated by breastfeeding, and as I continued to feed my first child 5 months into this pregnancy, my body basically got a megga dose of it. The muscles are then too weak and dysfunctional to support the pelvic bone structure and, as a result, the bones grind together and flippin' hurt. In many cases, the issue resolves soon after giving birth, but breastfeeding can prolong the recovery. 3 weeks postpartum and I still can't even walk. Just shuffling around the house is excruciating agony and my right hip feels as though it might give way beneath me at any moment... not ideal when carrying a vulnerable newborn around with you. It's pretty miserable and, for someone so active, it's really impacting on my lifestyle and sense of self.
I did start back on my Wattbike at 8 days postpartum, and it didn't seem to make the problem any worse, but then, it certainly wasn't getting any better, so I have reluctantly decided to stay at home and do sod all for a week to see if it helps the healing. This is honest to God the longest period of inactivity I have ever endured in my entire life and it's mentally killing me! Physically, I know I can bounce back to fitness as soon as I am pain free and able to resume training, but sitting on my arse all day every day is just so completely alien to me, and I've been doing it for over ten weeks now, so it's wearing a little thin. I just have to keep telling myself: short term pains for long term gains, and it's best to rest now, during lockdown, than when things start to open up again and the good weather comes. I am booked in to see my trusty physio, Nigel Wilman at Honiton Physio, on Monday, so I hope that he will be able to work his Wilman magic and give me a rehab program to chivvy things along a bit.
That's it really. Not much else to tell. Marathons now mean all night booby feeding sessions; HIIT training means trying to stay mentally sane enough to accept the situation and not HIIT my head against a brick wall; and Ironman is the ongoing supplements I'm taking to try and stave off the anaemia. My identity as a triathlete has very much been replaced by my identity as a Mum. And that is just fine with me... though the Ellie who wants to have her cake and eat it (and without putting weight on), most strongly identifies as a Mum-who-tris (as opposed to the current 'tries'), and that is the me I will strive to get back to, whilst enjoying precious time with my wonderful family of four and some down time from sport in the meantime. Thank God there are no events or parkruns to tempt me at present anyway! And, who knows, if I am playing the long game and aiming for a comeback in the vet-40 ranks, this break may well do me some good!
